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Doctors Shocked as Experiments on Children Prove Harmful

 Noted propaganda outlet, The New York Times, admitted that puberty blockers and cross-sex hormones may have negative side effects on children, such as reduced bone density. Doctors are stunned to realize that medications designed to interfere with normal human growth could do anything other than help.

"This is hard for us to understand," said Dr. Dorothy Jekyll, "We know these kids have the wrong bodies, because children's desires are always grounded in reality. I almost wonder if we just aren't giving them enough experimental drugs. I've always believed, if your first experiment fails, experiment harder. That's the scientific method."

Our sources say pre-eminent physician, Dr. Jill Biden, refused to comment, but was lip-read saying, "How could we have known? Not a single person in America could have predicted this. When have unnecessary medications and surgeries ever hurt anyone before? There's no precedent for this."

Some Democrat leaders suspect Donald Trump is behind this medical malpractice. Outgoing House Speaker, Nancy Pelosi commented, "Well, we know he's transphobic. We know he wanted to inject people with bleach. Who knows what he's putting into these poor transgender children?"

But there is hope in medicine. Dr. Dorothy was excited to tell us about a new infant weight-loss drug that promises to solve the obesity epidemic as soon as early next year.

Story by Nate Holstein

New Hereford Bull'O'Meter: 75%
Base story true, quotes speculative.
Original story:
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